Hold onto your britches, folks, for I’ve just had a peculiar tussle with a tome by the name of Win, Lose or Die by John Gardner, a yarn featuring that fellow, Ian Fleming‘s Agent 007.
My rating for Win, Lose or Die– 3
Buy Win, Lose or Die from Amazon.com*
More books by John Gardner*
John Gardner’s Bond series (16 book series) *
A Most Unconventional Assignment for Mr. Bond
Now, this particular escapade is as odd as a three-legged dog. Our man Bond, usually found hobnobbing with dames and driving conveyances faster than a greased weasel, is stuck aboard a British carrier, ferrying around some highfalutin’ VIPs for a secret pow-wow. The premise, mind you, stretches out for a whole year! And what does our dashing spy have to do? Why, master the art of flying a Harrier jet, of all things! One can only surmise the author, Mr. Gardner, simply shrugged and said, “Why not?”
And if that ain’t peculiar enough, Bond, a lone wolf by nature, is suddenly saddled with a veritable army of security chaps from three different nations. No fancy duds, no lightning-fast automobiles, no high living for our hero this time around. Instead, he’s relegated to the humble abode of a mass hall, a noisy jet, and the unglamorous life of a Navy man. It’s enough to make a gentleman sigh into his gin and tonic,
A Curious Brew of Thrills and Tedium
Win, Lose or Die is a strange concoction, a bit of this, a bit of that. Part technothriller, part murder-mystery, and a hefty dose of military action, but bless my soul, there’s hardly a whiff of actual espionage. The kindest word I can muster for this book is “competent.” Mr. Gardner, it’s plain to see, knows his onions. He handles the gizmos and gadgets and the bangs and booms with a masterful hand.
Yet, for a tale that spans a whole year, it moves along at a breathless clip, like a runaway stagecoach. We’re granted glimpses into the minds of sundry characters, but only after they’ve stumbled upon some crucial nugget for the plot. This hopping about makes for a dizzying ride, and frankly, it strains the credulity something fierce. And as for the plot twists, well, they’re as subtle as a bull in a china shop, bordering on the preposterous.
A Villain for the Ages… of Incompetence
Then there’s the villain, a fellow named Bassam Baradj. Now, I’ve seen my share of scoundrels in my day, but this Baradjchap is so spectacularly inept that even James Bond himself points it out! How a blithering idiot like him managed to orchestrate a scheme to snatch three of the world’s most powerful leaders is a mystery worthy of Sherlock Holmes himself – a mystery to Baradj, to Bond, and certainly to this humble reader. One might charitably think it a bit of Mr. Gardner’s famous tongue-in-cheek humor, but I’m inclined to believe it’s simply a regrettable lapse into parody.
Bond, A Fish Out of Water
And our dear Bond? He seems as out of place as a tuxedo at a hog roast, visibly uncomfortable with this whole “teamwork” notion, and casting a rather disdainful eye upon the young sailors. Truth be told, this book might have fared better had it not been shackled to the Bond franchise, which, let’s face it, comes with certain expectations of derring-do and gentlemanly fantasy. Nevertheless, it’s an honest effort, but it’s about as “Bond-like” as a temperance meeting.
The Gist of It (for Those Who Insist)
So, the long and short of it is this: During a grand military exercise dubbed “Landsea 89,” a clandestine confab is arranged, bringing together the bigwigs of England, the United States, and Russia – none other than Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, President George H. W. Bush, and Premier Mikhail Gorbachev.
Naturally, some obscure band of ne’er-do-wells, styling themselves the Brotherhood of Anarchy and Secret Terrorism (BAST), aim to spoil the party. And so, M, in his infinite wisdom, dispatches James Bond to personally safeguard this secret shindig, all under the rather flimsy guise of him returning to serve in Her Majesty’s Royal Navy. A grand premise, indeed, but one that takes a rather winding and peculiar path.
Buy Win, Lose or Die from Amazon.com*
More books by John Gardner*
John Gardner’s Bond series (16 book series) *
More books by John Gardner*
John Gardner’s Bond series (16 book series) *
Zohar — Man of la Book
Disclaimer: I bought this book
*Amazon links point to an affiliate account, the money is usually spent on books
Disclaimer: I bought this book
*Amazon links point to an affiliate account, the money is usually spent on books
